Fuck my husband

In all honesty, most women at clubs ignore me completely: I’m shorter than most dancers, I’m nowhere near as aggressive or shadowy (which girls at male strip clubs seem to want more than the nice guys they can see anytime at home), and I make no secret of the fact that I’m gay. I understand completely why I would be invisible to most women at a strip club – there’s really no fantasy that they might seduce me. But every once in a while I will inadvertently charm the ladies. This is becoming more common as I gain muscle mass (because I’ve gradually, over the last several months, become more and more mistaken for heterosexual – it happenedย three times Friday night and twice on Saturday). Passing for straight isn’t my goal or my priority, but it can be fun playing with people’s expectations, now that presumption doesn’t sit at 100 percent.

There were three women sitting at the bar. Everything I did titillated them. I actually enjoyed this, because I absolutely love women. When I finally came around to them, so that they could talk to me and tip me, they were lovely. Once I was actually there in front of them, two of the three were reluctant to touch me at first. It was taboo, I suppose. The married one had no trouble at all. I thought this was especially marvelous. They liked my ass, biceps, and abs in particular.

“Oh my God! You make me want to go home and fuck my husband!”

“Well… that’s my job.” (I didn’t really know how to respond to this, since I don’t get a chance to chat with girls much at work.)

“It’s too bad you don’t like me.”

“I do like you!”

“It’s too bad you don’t want to fuck me.” (Aha! They do know I’m gay!)

“Susan, I will respect you more than any man you will ever meet.” (Said very coyly with a wink as I kissed her hand.)

“Oh, damn… Respect me some other time!”

I love my work.

Author: Devon Hunter

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13 Comments

  1. just make sure at the end of the night, you know what team you play for……lol. you are the mvp of our league!!!

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  2. You are a charmer aren’t you Devon?

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  3. LOL – I’m still laughing at this! You did that so well!

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  4. Hahaha!!

    Devon Hunter: Marital Aid. lol

    So, I take it this was not a gay bar? Or wait, you get multiple choice:

    A.) It is not strictly a gay bar, but the clientele are overwhelmingly men who want to see men.

    B.) It is a gay bar, but money is money and anyone is welcome to watch and to spend theirs, as long as the straight women don’t start taking over the place, and as long as they aren’t beligerant about the fact that their dirty little minds are the only place they are going to nom nom nom on Devon.

    C.) It’s a straight bar. This was ladies’ night.

    Anyhoo, LOL!!

    The way you dealt with this, your attitude about it all, the openness and equilibrium . . . so cool!

    I’m surprised, though, I guess, that you are cool with women touching you. I suppose it would depend on the kind of touching or the accompanying comments?

    But wait–it’s no different! OF COURSE, right? It’s not like you’re personally attracted to every MAN you dance for, though I’m sure you make them feel as if you are. So I guess it’s no different if it’s a woman, just another type of person you simply aren’t personally attracted to, but in whom you can find enough to inspire sensuality. Or at least in their reaction?

    Interesting! You always give me so much to think about!

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  5. jennifer: B. and yes, i am cool with women touching me – i even took their hands and put them a few places, just so they knew i wasn’t discriminating against them. ๐Ÿ˜‰ so, you’ve already answered your own questions, i think…

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  6. Yup, I did. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I just like to think aloud sometimes.

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  7. Yes, Devon, you are being mistaken for being straight! I visited Richards on saturday feb 28 and again on tuesday march 3. My friend and I got a table dance from you on saturday. You came and sat on my lap on tuesday and asked if I wanted a dance, and I said I only had enough money for the dwarf. I would also say that you kept putting my glasses on your dick, but you probably do that to a lot of guys, so that won’t help you remember me. I have a white beard that I only stopped dyeing a month ago, and that has rendered me completely invisible, I have found. Anyway, I thought you were straight. And for reasons that I do not understand (and there may be no valid reasons for this) I have sort of felt like *I* am being exploited by straight male nude dancers. If they are straight, they are not on the same page as I, and they could not possibly understand what they are (or are not) doing to me by those moves they have learned to perform. Now you, Devon, are a fantastic dancer with loads of personality, but you sounded so much like a straight guy when you spoke that I thought you were straight. My gaydar doesn’t always work (obviously) and I was wrong about you. I think that I’m afraid a straight dancer may be secretly loathing me or laughing at me behind my back or something….I haven’t fully explored those feelings, but you seem to be so wise in these kinds of matters maybe you can shed some light on it for me. It was obvious, however, that Preston was gay from the way he spoke to me. He fascinates me for many reasons. I think he is beautiful, but perhaps the most fascinating thing about him is that I marvel at the self acceptance and self confidence that a gay dwarf must have to be able to dance naked onstage next to 5 other guys who look like Adonis. And he does very well with tips, and they are not “sympathy” tips–he truly captivates people in his own very powerful way. Having seen him there on saturday, I showed up with 7 other friends that I had told about him, and they all were mesmerized as well. And so, Devon, out of curiosity I Googled Gay dwarf Atlanta, and found your post about Preston. I immediately recognized you and started reading many of your blog articles and exploring your posts…..you are a very fascinating person. I could type a long time about some of my favorite things you have said but perhaps you might not care! LOL!! I have been 24 years old way longer than you have…….and I have now reached the age where it has truly become a very real barrier between me and people whom I find interesting. But so much of what you have written is so true, like after age 30 realizing that you already are good enough even if the world doesn’t know it (those aren’t your exact words) and advice you gave to a guy to cut the asshole boyfriend loose…..I have decided I really like the way you think…..and your poetic words about keystones and arches….and on and on….. So I want you to know that, because of medical bills, I really did only have enough money for “the dwarf” that night. You are hot and I’m glad to know you are gay. You had me fooled. I’ll be back with enough money to cut you into the action next time…..but I can’t afford a VIP room! About 12 years ago when I was still passing for “hot,” a very cute dancer got me in a VIP room (I won’t say where) and he was gay, and he got very hot with me….I did not ask him to do the things he did to me, he insisted. Let’s just say I weighed a few ounces less, and he a few ounces more, after it was all said and done. We were back there for about 20 songs, and he said I owed about thirty six thousand dollars, but he only charged me for two songs. I don’t think anything like that will ever happen to me again. I’m still surprised that it happened then. But I’m very afraid of going into a VIP room and running up another thirty six thousand dollar bill and no longer being cute enough or young enough to slip out of paying it. So I shall begin putting some money away for a few table dances from you, Devon. When you sat in my lap and rubbed all over me on tuesday night, well…….it worked……even though I thought you were straight. And as for Preston, I had asked him for a table dance and he waited for several songs before showing up….I saw him walking around and standing against the wall…..then he showed up just one song before he was to go onstage. He did this on purpose so he could get away from the old man….(I’m not stupid and it did sort of hurt my little feelings). I had planned to get two dances from him, but he only left time for one. I told him I had planned to get two dances, but after he danced onstage he left without asking if I still wanted the other one. So, I guess I can’t even pay for it with some dancers! I hadn’t talked to him, or touched him or anything disrespectful at all. So, even though I like him, he will get no more of my money. But you will! I don’t go there very much because even at my age, I still do not *have* to “pay for it.” But that day’s a’comin’ soon, I think! LOL!! Thanks for sharing all those thoughts in you blogs and posts. You’re cool as hell!

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  8. steve, i think you have mistaken me for the dancer at swinging richards named dallas. i have never danced there on a tuesday, i don’t put glasses on my dick (though i’ve seen dallas do it), and i’ve danced with preston on only two nights (a wednesday and a thursday). dallas IS straight, and he and i get mistaken for each other constantly. i wish i could own all the admiration dallas earned in person, but i’m happy to thank you for appreciating my words ๐Ÿ™‚

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  9. Well, NOW I’m going to have to show up just to see who is writing all these fantastic posts! ๐Ÿ™‚

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  10. Hey! It was great meeting you tonight! You are much more talented than Dallas. I’m glad you turned out to be you and not him! Everybody has such different energy in that place! Yours is fantastic!

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  11. I just noticed the time posts on these messages are about 2 hours behind real time…….leave it to me to notice something like that!

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  12. Well, it’s happening again: The blog is eating comments… I got a comment to post for this entry from one of the three women that I was talking about in this entry (yes, it’s a long time after I wrote the entry), and she clarified that it was respect (not a sense of taboo) that kept her hands off me. well… my dear… to answer your question (that no one here gets to see): Yes, you can definitely touch my abs, and I promise I won’t be offended by it ๐Ÿ˜‰

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  13. When will you be back in Columbia?

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